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March 1999 Reviews

RATING SYSTEM | The Chamber Strings | Child's View | The Cornbowl Pork-O-Panties | Hugh Cornwell | Iron Savior | I Want To Live | The Jaymen | Jeremy | Johnny Cool | The Juliana Theory | Abraham Lincoln | little a | Low | Manual Scan | The Metalunas | Needle | Nobodys | No Motiv | Pan Sonic | Silver Scooter | Sassy Poot and the Accidental Bettyland | Supafuzz | Swingin' On The Strings | Tri-Danielson | Underground Snobs | The Vindictives | Wellwater Conspiracy | Western Sod

*Additional Items Received*


THE CHAMBER STRINGS - Gospel Morning (CD, Bobsled, Pop)
Yeah...absolutely STUNNING emotional pop music that brings to mind Epic Soundtracks (one of the great unknown talents of the decade!). The Chamber Strings are led by melodic brain Kevin Junior, whose former bands included Mystery Girls and Rosehips. Not only can Kevin write melodies that stick like mental glue, but his vocals are sincere and moving (sounding at times somewhat like Russel Mael, of all people...). To top it all off, the lyrics are pensive, intelligent, and insightful. Gospel Morning is easily one of the best pop CDs I've heard in recent years. The disc swells with inspirational melodies and a truly unique spirit. Our faves (thus far) are "Flashing Star," "Telegram," "All Of Your Life," and "Thank My Lucky Stars." A MUST FOR POP FANS! (Rating: 6)

CHILD'S VIEW - Funfair (CD, Bubble Core, Electronic)
In our sometimes disillusioning search for the unusual and original (which at times seems an impossible task), we are sometimes surprised by the things that seem to slip through the cracks. Child's View music is creepy, somewhat ambient, experimental, and just plain odd. The band is actually the project of Japanese recording artist Nobukazu Takemura, who has already had great success in his home country. Funfair contains but six lengthy tunes...but within these tunes this artist covers a lot of ground. The best cuts are the ones with an overall hypnotic, trance-like feel. Only a couple of tracks are hampered somewhat by the overly busy percussion. Computer generated music doesn't HAVE to sound bad. Intelligent and slightly offbeat. (Rating: 5)

THE CORNBOWL PORK-O-PANTIES - Daddy's Always Watching (Pork product)
"How many years until our swell hut grows down to the bounty?" hawned ol' Sassy Patch. "That ain't for us to know, but for you to find out!" answered her grandmother, reaching down deep in Sassy's mystery area. The grandaughter and grandmother slid deep down under the table and slapped the batter one way and the other, until Mr. Swill got his cornfeed and came down hard on the hammerdog. "Ya'll better slaw up some fritters, less'n I crawbaby up to the attic for NATURE!" he commanded in his very best hee-haw tooter. Meanwhile, The Cornbowl Pork-O-Panties just rushed on past...ignoring what they could and concealing the rest. The distant stares pocked the lace that was stitched down inside casting ignorant shadows on the bastards outside. (Rating: 2)

HUGH CORNWELL - Black Hair Black Eyes Black Suit (CD, Velvel, Pop)
I'm not quite sure whether I think it's a good idea to compare an artist's current work to their past work...but in a way it's inevitable. Whatever the case, you would never know from listening to this that the man singing was once the angry evil presence behind the wild and aggressive Stranglers (a band I was wild about when in college). Hugh Cornwell has mellowed a great deal over time. This is a collection of soft and slick pop seemingly aimed at garnering commercial radio airplay and selling units. While this doesn't quite crunch my nuggets the way I like 'em crunched, I can still appreciate this guy's guitar playing...'cause that's one area where he still excels. If you liked later Stranglers stuff, you'll probably enjoy this.'s listenable... (Not Rated)

IRON SAVIOR - Unification (CD, Noise, Metal pop)
Anyone who liked the rockier side of Uriah Heep will probably get off on Germany's latest metal pop band Iron Savior. This band combines big production techniques with epic-like songs to create guitar-heavy pop metal that is amazingly strong in the melody department. This is the band's second album, and it's a keeper. While I don't mind admitting that most metal music is a droning blur of monotony, this band is NOT. They're smart...slightly different from the rest...but most importantly, they play like there's no tomorrow. Plus the vocalist and the guitarists are SUPERB. This disc contains fifteen cuts including "Coming Home," "Captain's Log," and "Neon Knights." (Rating: 4)

I WANT TO LIVE - Soundtrack: Johnny Mandel's Great Jazz Score (CD, Ryko/MGM, Soundtrack reissue)
Mmmmmmmmmmm GERTRUDE! This is so good I wanna SPANK myself! This disc is part of the Ryko series of MGM soundtrack re-releases. Now available for the first time on CD, the soundtrack to I Want To Live sounds as crisp and clear as if it were recorded yesterday. Johnny Mandel wrote the score, and what a score this is. The music is sultry, sexy, and downright seductive (which is just how Susan Hayward was in the film). In addition to the remastered tracks from the film, this disc also includes the companion album The Jazz Combo which features an additional six tracks. If you're into jazz you won't do much better than this. EXCELLENT! (Rating: 5)

THE JAYMEN - Hit & Run! (CD, Get Hip Recordings, Guitar rock instrumental)
They've got the right look to fit their sound. The Jaymen play frantic little rock instrumentals that peddle past like pastry on a figure line. The flubby dub rhythms yink yank and hold up a jittery jet stable array of wacky pack guitar. This CD combines tunes from the band's first two vinyl LPs Drive It Home and Missing Links. These goddamn tunes are very upbeat and have that garage heavy sound that is so popular among many of the young adults of today. Instead of muddying the pudding with vocals that no one wants anyway, these three young men just play it jagged and straight. You get a lot here. Everything from "Avalance" and "Slinky" down to "Black Widow" and "The Shadow Knows." There is good and bad everywhere. The Jaymen are GOOD. (Rating: 4)

JEREMY - Salt the Planet (CD, Moonchild, Progressive pop/rock)
The man of a thousand CDs, videos, and musical styles is back once again with a trippy collection of seventies inspired progressive rock that brings to mind a whole slew of artists like Camel, Yes, Steve Hillage, and Tangerine Dream. Jeremy is not an artist stuck in one genre. His releases shift from pure pop to all-out rock to progressive rock...and the man never misses a beat. That he is able to release a couple of CDs per year blows me away...particularly seeing as how he always manages to keep the quality up. Salt the Planet contains seven lengthy tunes of thickly produced progressive pop, heavy on keyboards this time around. I will admit that I miss hearing more guitars this time around...simply because this guy is such a mindblowing guitarist. there anything Jeremy CAN'T do??? (Rating: 4)

JOHNNY COOL - Billy May's Original Motion Picture Score (CD, Ryko/MGM, Soundtrack)
Those fine folks at Ryko deserve some extra big squishy bonus points for their series of MGM soundtrack reissues. New music is great, but old music (me thinks for today) sounds MUCH better! Billy May (known for his work with Frank Sinatra and Peggy Lee among others) wrote the score for Johnny Cool. These tunes are chock full of punchy horns, plaintive melodies, and some stunningly emotional jazz music...which was probably what made this movie so great in the first place. In addition to the instrumentals, there are also two cuts which feature Sammy Davis, Jr. on vocals. To top it all off, there are great liner notes, a reproduction of the movie poster, and MORE. Great music, great packaging...that's the Ryko way, eh? (Rating: 5)

THE JULIANA THEORY - Understand This Is A Dream (CD, Tooth & Nail, Pop)
Upbeat guitar buzz pop reminiscent of Material Issue. This Adamsburg, Pennsylvania based band has a vocalist who sounds not unlike an early Rick Springfield at times The rhythms are steady and strong and the guitars loud and vibrant. What appeals to me most about the band are the background vocals. Combining different elements of old and new school pop, The Juliana Theory manage to entertain throughout the duration of this disc. Light and fun stuff. (Not Rated)

ABRAHAM LINCOLN (Compulsive liar kind of person kind of thing)
Abraham Lincoln...what a LIAR! The goddamn old fruit always lied...every goddamn single time. First he lied to his parents...then his grandparents...then his children...then an ENTIRE GENERATION. In the end, he even lied to himself. You see, "Honest Abe" was a goddamn HOMO...right behind everyone's backs. Abraham Lincoln...a stinking, lying, goddamn homosexual. Thank God the man's DEAD. (Rating: 2)

little a - b (CD, SayAaaahh!!, Pop)
God what a GREAT band name. And everyone says that all the names have been taken. There are tons of great names there for the taking...but there are a lot of unimaginative folks grazing the fields. Fortunately for little a, their sound is as appealing as the name. The music is slightly abstract and surreal soothing pop with killer production tricks sprinkled throughout. Drifting slightly surreal melodies creep into your tonio and get bonked off on down the spardo. There are lots of studio oriented pop bands out there. Mostly they B-O-R-I-N-G (that spells spandex). little a manage to come up with a whole shitload of keepers on b, making it a must hear for fans of quality underground pop. Numbers like "Sometimes," "Down To Me," and "Creep" scrape us ultragleamy and clean. Goddamn it brain done been TEH-cutt! (Rating: 5)

LOW - Secret Name (CD, Kranky, Slow pop)
Slow, pretty, and slighty more produced...Secret Name is the best thing yet from Low. That's saying something too, considering the quality output of this prolific and highly influential trio. This band rather single-handedly created the whole "slow core" movement (which in retrospect was really more like a bunch of bands trying to get on the Low bandwagon). These folks have sounded soothing and cool before...but I think they're only now reaching their peak. The disc includes twelve tunes. Our faves are "I Remember," "2-Step," "Soon," and "Immune." Another absolutely stunning collection of tunes. (Rating: 5)

MANUAL SCAN - All Night Stand (CD, Get Hip Recordings, Pop/rock)
A curious oddity from the past, San Diego's Manual Scan somehow managed to avoid much of the spotlight back in the eighties. This retrospective of the band's lengthy career is an eye opener. I, for one, had never heard of the band before hearing this. The music is perky upbeat power pop that is reminiscent of a variety of popsters from the sixties onward. Features twenty-one tunes, including a great many previously unreleased tracks. (Not Rated)

THE METALUNAS - X-Minus-One (CD, American Pop Project, Surf)
Before you go "BLEAH! More goddamn SURF music!" (usually my reaction), calm down and listen closely...'cause when it's Canada's Mark Brodie on guitar, it's something MIGHTY SPECIAL. Mark's been at it for quite awhile now...recording under different band names (The Beaver Patrol, The Saboteurs). Now back in Canada after a stint living and recording in Japan, this disc is yet another WINNER. Whereas most people in this genre are mere imitators, Mr. Brodie is the REAL thing. He makes his guitar (I can't believe I'm saying this) SPEAK. A totally upbeat and fun experience, this disc is for folks who like surf music...but are SICK AS HELL of all the bad surf bands out there. Includes "Blast Off!," "Sheilds Up!," "Celluloid Planetoid," and MORE... (Rating: 5)

NEEDLE - Needle (Independent CD, Progressive rock)
Weaving in and out of several musical styles, one man band Jeremy Needle displays an obvious command of the recording studio. Mr. Needle wrote, conceived, arranged, engineered, and produced this entire disc and released it himself. Basically, this is studio rock/pop with a metallic edge...but the tunes sometimes blur over into progressive Frank Zappa-esque stuff. It's the experimental, almost non-musical segments of this disc which are most some of the effects and instrumentation are damn spacey and cool... (Not Rated)

NOBODYS - Generation XXX (CD, Hopeless, Rock)
Punchy fun punk/pop with attitude and chunky nuts. Nobodys aren't trying to proving nothing to nobody. They're just turning up the volume and pumping out fast scorchers so that they and their audience can jump around like frantic banshees and have BIG GOOD TIME. There are so many lame and samey punk/pop bands out there...but that just makes Nobodys stand out even more. If you're not too old or limp, grab hold tight and get ready...cuz there's TWENTY-FIVE snotty little rockers on this here shiny. Song titles? Consider "Doing It For the Kids," "Dude's Gonna Shoot," "Another Stupid Song," and "Ain't No One Getting Laid." Simple, stupid, straightforward, and hyper. (Rating: 5)

NO MOTIV - And The Sadness Prevails (CD, Vagrant, Rock/pop)
Hyperactive power punk with brains. The band's assaultive wall of guitar sound belies their basically pure pop approach to songwriting. Instead of trying to be cute or clever, these four guys just let 'er rip naturally...creating a very cohesive batch of tunes in the process. And The Sadness Prevails contains eleven direct hits...including "Nostalgia," "Waiting Hurt," "Mid-Season Change," and "Shells." Before you give up on guitar bands of the nineties, give No Motiv a spin. Simple, good fun. (Rating: 5)

PAN SONIC - A (CD, Mute, Electronic noise)
Ever wonder how to get unwanted guests to leave your home? This disc just might do the trick. Formerly Panasonic, these guys recently changed their name to Pan Sonic. Can you guess why? This is the kind of stuff that just GRATES on my friends' nerves. All the more reason to play it. Playing music that makes other people feel uncomfortable and gives them headaches is a GOOD thing. I like it when people suffer. Apparently Pan Sonic do too. Otherwise they wouldn't record stuff like this. This is non-music. Most people will wonder why someone even bothered to record and release something like this, but that's probably just the point. We live in an age where people can record and release matter how absurd it is. Freedom of expression is an UGLY thing. Creativity breeds evil. You won't be hearing this one on the radio anytime soon. No, no, no. It's GREAT! (Rating: 5)

SILVER SCOOTER - Orleans Parish (CD, Peek-a-Boo Industries, Pop)
Well written and well produced pensive pop with an eighties sound. Basic overall sound reminds me of All About Chad. Simple chord changes are unhampered by busy production and are, instead, driven by good vocal melodies. This is one of those bands that just seems to slide along on its own merits instead of trying to put on an image or impress anyone. There are some excellent restrained guitar lines intertwined within these these very poppy compositions. Though these guys may get lost in the sea of too-many-pop-bands-in-the-nineties, their stuff stands out because it comes across as genuine and sincere. Plus they have the ability to write tunes that really do stick in your head. Our faves are "Tribute to the Phone Calls" and "If Nonsense Only Knew." Neaterific. (Rating: 4)

Oh Sassy Poot...won't you be my, won't you be my only Sassy Poot...let's have embryos an' set 'em up on pretty pretty please...oh Sassy Poot...oh Sassy Poot. Dear Sassy Poot...I won't forget you when the Nassie Flaws...we're better off when we're collapsing on our knees...but listen to the breeze...dear Sassy Poot...dear Sassy Poot. But OH...way down there in the Accidental Bettyland...there's something that concerns me, my love. It's nothing from's underneath your dove...sweet...dove...pox... Sassy Poot...we'll shine forever like those shitting stars...until the passerbys go shuffle off in pliffle duff bog progs...arx natchy bilj...gnaw prathy krigg... (Rating: 2)

SUPAFUZZ - Supafuzz (CD, Gotham, Rock)
Excellent hard rock with a masculine edge. Led by former lead singer for Lexington's Black Cat Bone (a band that deserved a great deal more recognition that they got), Supafuzz is basically picking up where Cat left off...although this music is a bit more ballsy. Sounding something like a cross between King's X and Walt Mink (more the former than the latter), Supafuzz is a band for people who are into great guitar riffs. The rhythm section is solid and defined...the guitars busy and complex...and the vocals powerful. It all adds up to a hard rock band that oughta go over BIG with lotsa folks. The band effectively combines commercial appeal with way above average tunes. KILLER! (Rating: 4)

SWINGIN' ON THE STRINGS - The Speedy West & Jimmy Bryant Collection Volume 2 (CD, Razor & Tie, Guitar and pedal steel instrumentals)
Wheeeeewwwwww dawgie! If you think all these modern rock guitar players can play fast, you ain't heard NUTHIN' until you've heard Jimmy Bryant's fingers whiz up and down the fretboard. Not only is this guy faster than your average modern guitarist schmuck, but also he doesn't rely on effects! This collection of tunes Bryant recorded with his buddy Speedy West (on pedal steel) is like listening to bumblebees buzzing amidst some simple toe tapping good time music from a time gone by. The twenty tunes on this disc (recorded in the fifties) sound absolutely stunning. The sound quality is great, but it's the sincerity and chops that these guys had which still shines through today. While all the tunes are grippers, our particular faves are "Frettin' Fingers," "Skiddle-Dee-Boo," and "Caffeine Patrol." This KICKS! (Rating: 5)

TRI-DANIELSON - Tri-Danielson!!! (CD, Tooth & Nail, Pop)
This is an odd one. The outfit originally came together when the Danielson kids' father created a family singing/songwriting group. Well, the kids are grown now...and they're continuing in their father's tradition. It's a lot stranger than you might think. Instead of being sing-songy and predictable, Tri-Danielson's tunes are rather abstract and peculiar. The siblings incorporate a wide variety of instruments, voices, and sounds into their tunes...and the vocals range from plaintive to almost silly. This is one of those rare cases where I just can't seem to pin these folks down...which may be exactly what they're after! Offbeat and subtle... (Not Rated)

UNDERGROUND SNOBS (Obnoxious retarded people kind of things)
One of the biggest problems in the world of underground music and art is all the pretentious underground snobs running around everywhere. These slimeball retardos have nothing more to do than run around soaking up all the things that other people do...and then they want to proclaim to all their friends that they're the FIRST ONES in on some really cool (and completely unimportant) thing. Underground snobs are driven mainly by their own insecurities. Because they feel inadequate, they feel that by pushing their own filthy tastes on other people that they will in some way be bigger in their own goddamn minds. Why do I really hate underground snobs so much? Why, because I'm one of them, of course... (Rating: 2)

THE VINDICTIVES - Partytime For Assholes (CD, Liberation, Rock/pop)
Wow. A different kind of collection of cover tunes. The Vindictives' choice of material is top notch...and while they're basically playing punk/power pop versions of these tunes, they somehow manage to capture the original intent (which is usually lost because most bands try to be so cute and clever that they make sloppy disasters of old classics). Crashing out of the gates with 10CC's classic "Rubber Bullets" (a big hit in England that flopped in the shitty ol' U.S.A.), these guys don't let up for the duration of this twenty-five song disc. Highlights include Nilsson's "Space Man," Ohio Express's "Chewy Chewy," T. Rex's obscure "Teen Riot Structure," and The Archies' "Bang Shang A Lang." While I usually hate cover discs...this one's REAL COOL... (Rating: 4)

WELLWATER CONSPIRACY - Brotherhood of Electric: Operational Directives (CD, Time Bomb Recordings, Pop)
Thick cerebral pop with a slight garage feel. Wellwater Conspiracy is the duo of Matt Cameron and John McBain with other friends lending their various talents from song to song. This band is a hard one to put your finger on (although I'm sure we'd all like to put our fingers on a hard one, wouldn't we?). Anyway...this band's tunes have a strange urgency that reminds me at times of Varnaline...although the music is much more pop oriented. Of particular interest here are the guitars...these guys' don't play like everyone else. In fact, the overall sound doesn't quite sound like anything else I've heard lately. True alternative rock. (Not Rated)

WESTERN SOD - Trans-Appalachian Tracks In Sound (CD, Peeten Up, Pop)
I like this band's sound as well as their ideas and approach. This disc is rather amazing considering it's an independent release (contrary to popular belief independent does not always necessarily mean better). Western Sod use various extensions of their name for amusement...Sounds of Distraction, Sons of Distortion, Scenes of Destruction... Unconventional. The music? Basic pop/rock...but the band's tunes, vocals, and musicianship stand out because their music is both accessible and just slightly unique. This disc is a re-release that contains both the album the CD is named after as well as The Mouthy Latina. Twenty-five tunes in all. Unfortunately don't have a web site or e-mail address here...but the contact address is E. Meckley, 1128 Masonic Ave., Apt. B, San Francisco, CA 94117. (Rating: 4)


Abuse Ment Park - Electric Spanking Session (CD, Surf)
Alternative Press Review (Magazine, Vol. 3, No. 2)
Antonio's Apple - When Time Stood Still (Independent CD)
Bent Leg - Fatima (CD, File 13)
Big Dirty Beats 2 (CD, Moonshine, Various artists)
Buck O Nine
- Libido (CD, TVT)
By Divine Right - Bless This Mess (CD, Nettwerk)
The Causey Way - W W C D (CD, Put It On A Cracker)
Claudia Chalk - Contrasts (Independent CD)
(CD, Hefty, Various artists)
Ciara - Facade (CD, Orange)
Crayola Summer
- A Pile of Stuff (Italian import cassette, Best Kept Secret)
Deviate - Darkened World (CD, I Scream)
Alpha Yaya Diallo - The Message (CD, Wicklow/BMG)
Dirty Poodle - Dirty Poodle (CD, Put it on a Cracker)
Doctor Explosion - The Subnormal Revolution of Doctor Explosion (CD, Get Hip Recordings)
Ed Temple - The Act of Gabriel (CD, Blue Moon Recordings)
Ensign - Cast the First Stone (CD, Nitro)
EQ (Magazine, February 1999)
Facilities (Magazine, December 1998)
Flipside (Magazine, #116)
Gameface - Every Last Time (CD, Revelation)
The Grey A.M. - Move the Monuments East (CD, Fiddler)
Grinspoon - Guide To Better Living (CD, Universal)
Bruce Henderson - Beyond the Pale (CD, Paradigm)
Hit List (Magazine, Vol. 1, No. 1)
Hostile Omish - One Horse Power (CD, Punge)
Hotter Than Hell - An Injection of Psychobilly Madness (CD, Hairball 8/Cargo Music, Various artists)
House of Blues - Swings! (CD, Platinum, Various artists)
Penelope Houston - Tongue (CD, Reprise, Pop)
Hummer - Premium (CD, Accurate)
Immortal Dominion - Immortal Dominion (Independent CD)
Inspector 7 - Banished to Bogeyland (CD, Radical)
Jawbreaker - Soundtrack (CD, London, Various artists)
(Magazine, March 1999)
The Kiss Offs - Goodbye Private Life (CD, Peek-a-Boo Industries)
Lit - A Place In The Sun (CD, RCA/BMG, Pop)
The Lucy Nation - 4 Track Sampler (CD, Maverick)
M-16 - M-16 (CD, Mother West)
Martian Death Lyric - Tres Extranjeros (7" vinyl single, UGI)
Jim Masters - The Sound of Ultimate B.A.S.E. 2 (CD, Moonshine)
Jerry Dale McFadden - This Girl (CD, Plug)
Mean (Magazine, Issue #3)
The Neatbeats - Far and Near (CD, Get Hip Recordings)
Of Montreal - The Gay Parade (CD, Bar/None)
Of Things To Come (BYO, Various artists)
Old Pike - Ten Thousand Nights (CD, Epic/Sony)
Pep Squad - Yreka Bakery (CD, Tooth & Nail)
Ph Balance - Ph Balance (CD, Daemon)
Portable - Portable (CD, TVT)
Powerplay (Magazine, Issue 20)
Propagandhi - Where Quantity is Job #1 (CD, Welcoming Committee)
Pro Sound News (Magazine, February 1999)
Quick Dummies (Zine, #11)
Replication News (Magazine, January 1999)
The Revelers - Day In Day Out (CD, spinART)
Riff Raff - Kustom Made Hell (CD, F.S.A. Records)
Roadside Monument - I Am the Day of Current Taste (CD, Tooth & Nail)
6X - Kung-Pow! (CD, Deamon)
Screeching Weasel - Screeching Weasel (CD, V.M.L./Liberation, Rock)
Serial Killer Compilation (CD, Fearless, Various artists)
Skanatra - Skanatra (CD, P.O.S.)
Skinlab - Disembody: The New Flesh (CD, Century Media)
Shredding Paper (Magazine, Spring 1999)
SLC Punk - Original Soundtrack (CD, Hollywood)
Small Axe - Wheel of (Mis)Fortune (CD, Big Tree)
Songs From An Attic - A Keyhold Records Compilation (CD, Keyhole)
Songs: Ohia - Axxess & Ace (CD, Secretly Canadian)
Squatweiler - Horsepower (CD, spinART)
Subpoena the Past - This Year's Eclipse (CD)
Suretoss - Harmless Intentions '94-'97 (Italian import cassette, Best Kept Secret)
Swing This, Baby! II (CD, Slimstyle/Beyond)
2 Live Crew - Greatest Hits (CD, L'il Joe)
Trip the Planet - Trance (CD, Playground)
Uphollow - Soundtrack to an Imaginary Life (CD, Blue Moon Recordings)
Various Artists - Old School Vs. New School (CD, Zomba Recording Corp.)
Vegas Demilo - Before It Gets Old (CD, Starving Cowboy)
Vinyl Bill - Too Lazy To Rock (Italian import cassette, Best Kept Secret)
Warser Gate - Mirage (Italian import cassette, Best Kept Secret)
The West Virginia Surf Report (Zine, Issue #14)

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